I had a great day. Got up. Drove to the doctors, had a mammogram. That was fine. I went to the donut store, and came home for a nap.
Okay. It wasn't that great. I got up. But I when I stepped out of bed there was cat vomit in my slippers. Cleaned that up. Got into the car after getting ready, and went to the doctors. The doc's called me in for a mammogram. Left and had donuts and came home for a nap.
Okay, it wasn't that great. After having a night sleep, after yet another night of having the dog fart as he slept on my legs. I got to roll out of bed, and fall directly face first into a pile of cat vomit, that had something like a dead animal and maybe another piece of feces in there. I tried cleaning it all off, and after it was wiped down, I put my slippers on, and found that there was already a dried crusted chunk of bile that I must have missed now weaving in and out of my toes. It was too late to shower, so I put on a tshirt, and pants, a pair of shoes and got to the car, drove to the doc's, had a mammogram and drove home, stopping on the way for donuts.
Maybe it wasn't really as great as that either. What happened was, I dealt with an hour of peeling cat slime off my body, then I got into the car and found out I was out of gas. On the freeway. In my wheelchair. Three cops passed and finally a guy in a kid molesting clown costume pulled over and filled my tires with "balloon gas". I made it to the docs and got a mammogram, donuts on the way home, and took a nap.
Well, no it really wasn't that rosy either. There's really a bunch more, but I'll keep it clean and save it for stage.
Want a donut, officer?